When I was a student at the University of Kansas, I would walk along Jayhawk Boulevard to and from the Kansas Union and pass many, many people. We were all having the same external experience of walking along the beautiful central path through campus but I bet some of our internal experiences were very different. I probably knew what kind of day I was having but had no idea what was happening in their lives.
I recently read a very impactful book, Poor, by Katriona O’Sullivan, which caused me to reflect on my own sensitivity to and empathy for others. O’Sullivan very openly and generously shares her experiences as a child growing up in a very unstable and unsafe environment. In addition to sharing what we in the mental health field call very Adverse Childhood Events (ACES), she also introduces us to the adults in her world – some very helpful and some very dangerous and damaging.
I was particularly struck by the role of teachers in her life. Two teachers in particular were vital, caring, adults who served as safe havens and sources of support and belief in her. Other teachers, unfortunately, not so much.
The first teacher purchased, out of her own funds, a week’s worth of fresh underwear for very young Katriona to change into every day at school. This action both improved Katriona’s self-esteem but also addressed a source of bullying. In addition, this teacher heaped on the praise within her classroom, so Katriona felt encouraged and acknowledged as a smart young person.
When Katriona was a high school student, the second teacher saw great potential in her and encouraged her to take a more challenging course of study to set herself up for the potential to go to college. Even after Katriona became pregnant at 15 and became a mother at 16, the teacher never forgot her and assisted her in returning to school with childcare. Katriona went on to earn her doctorate in Psychology but not without many ups and downs. Yet, these two teachers saw her potential and encouraged it.
In my career as a teacher and psychologist, I have had the privilege of meeting many people from all walks of life. I have frequently seen my teacher colleagues bring food into their classrooms weekly to make sure that students have an opportunity to eat breakfast, lunch, or dinner. At faculty meetings, I have heard colleagues express concern about students who are struggling to make rent or need to visit the food pantry.
In my career as a psychologist, I have heard amazing stories of lives pulled out of poverty and dysfunction usually through education and mental health assistance. Thus, I’ve made a very specific decision over the last 6 months to do what I can to help people go to school, stay in school, and get the mental health support that they need. So here is my message to you – if you are a student, know that there are people out here who believe in you and support you. Ask teachers and colleagues about scholarship support and other resources to help you stay in school. If you are a person with extra resources, consider donating to a student emergency fund at your local college or university. Ask a teacher friend what you can do to help them support their students.
What you do matters to our future and that future is young people.